The practice whereby a guy would go to a girl’s home to talk with her, meet her parents and possibly have some refreshments is called “calling”. In calling, there was parental involvement and gave the girl more advantage in the relationship. Because all contact took place in her home, she control the environment. She either accept or refuse a caller. But in dating, is a different thing entirely.
It was by the mid of 1920s that dating strongly took over “calling”. Now, in dating, the guy has a upper hand. He take the girl into the outside world and pay for the expenses of transportation, dinning and entertainment. In dating, money becomes the order of the day. For a man, money is proportional to better date, that is, the more money the man has the better date he could provide and the better girl he could get along with.
When it comes to relationships teenagers are always crazy, teenagers are in dilemma, hoping in anything and everything that promises fulfillment or happiness. In dating, everybody has somebody-a boy friend, a girl friend. Unless and until you have somebody, then you doesn’t belong, especially for those who are looked at as “cool” must have a boyfriend or girlfriend.
There is a confusion among the born-again teens, because most of the world, including majority of the born-again community, has already determined that dating is a “recipe to a complete teenage experience”. Most people date because they are being push into it.
But a true born-again sees the dating way with heart breaking and pit falls of temptations, a path that is not look at as safe to marriage.
BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES OF COURTSHIP
Both parents and children must put hands on deck to walk out means to return to the more biblical principles of courtship.
Courtship is a reformed version of dating under the supervision of parents between a man and woman who are ready to marry in the near future. Courtship prevents the pit falls of contemporary dating and give a much safer, smoother rite to marriage between the man and the woman.
DATING IS A PROBLEM
The number one problem of dating is that, it has a little to do with marriage. Dating does not have a destination, it is only made for fun. In dating, there is no guideline, you are just floating around.
Young people experience the romantic and exciting site of a relationship without responsibility or commitment through dating. Dating provides feelings of intimacy and create emotional “highs” especially when he says “I love you” but it has nothing to hold it together. Dating among teens is nothing to write home about, because most teens who date are not in the position to marry. The relationship could only result into physical temptation induce by emotional intimacy becomes the aim of the relationship. There are some couples that break up at this point and move on to a new relationship seeking the excitement of “falling in love”. This kind of dating is nothing more than recruitment ground for divorce.
COURTSHIP IS A REMEDY
Courtship has a definite planned destination, that is a lasting marriage. Courtship could only begin when one is ready for marriage in the near future. You only court a person who you and your parents have accept her quality and you date someone you have no long time interest in.
The decision of when young people are ready for marriage is one that should be reached with the help of parents and based on certain criteria.
Young people should prepare for marriage in three (3) practical areas such as: career and finances, fatherhood and home maintenance. The areas of practical preparation for girls are: home-making, teaching and motherhood. These criteria obviously exclude a great number of teens.
In courtship no broken heart syndrome which is associated with dating. The toughest thing that will ever happen to a lady is breaking-up with her. When you give someone your heart, it’s different the next time around. You want to get along but you doubt doing it because you don’t want to get hurt again. In courtship the couple can terminate the aim in a courtship relationship is not to achieve physical and emotional intimacy. Courtship relationship is not long term. Courtship needs only as long as it takes to get to know a person and determine if he or she has certain characteristics. If the qualities are not there, no reason to continue courtship.
ONE MAJOR PITFALL OF DATING
Dating takes place outside of the home. It is two people being along, isolated from the rest of the world and their goal is privacy. This results to isolation from family, God and friends. There is almost always a breakdown in a relationship with God even without your intention. This isolation often leads to sexual temptation. “Flee the evil desires of youth”, too much of staying together may lead’s to sin. Dating separates two people from the protection of DATING. The practice whereby a guy would go to a girl’s home to talk with her, meet her parents and possibly have some refreshments is called “calling”. In calling, there was parental involvement and gave the girl more advantage in the relationship. Because all contact took place in her home, she control the environment. She either accept or refuse a caller. But in dating, is a different thing entirely.
It was by the mid of 1920s that dating strongly took over “calling”. Now, in dating, the guy has a upper hand. He take the girl into the outside world and pay for the expenses of transportation, dinning and entertainment. In dating, money becomes the order of the day. For a man, money is proportional to better date, that is, the more money the man has the better date he could provide and the better girl he could get along with.
When it comes to relationships teenagers are always crazy, teenagers are in dilemma, hoping in anything and everything that promises fulfillment or happiness. In dating, everybody has somebody-a boy friend, a girl friend. Unless and until you have somebody, then you doesn’t belong, especially for those who are looked at as “cool” must have a boyfriend or girlfriend.
There is a confusion among the born-again teens, because most of the world, including majority of the born-again community, has already determined that dating is a “recipe to a complete teenage experience”. Most people date because they are being push into it.
But a true born-again sees the dating way with heart breaking and pit falls of temptations, a path that is not look at as safe to marriage.
By Benedict Solomon
